Wonder Woman At The Olympics Part One: The Olympics Of Terror!!

Now that the 2012 Summer Olympics have started, I thought it might be fun to take a look at Wonder Woman’s varied and bizarre participation in all sorts of Olympic Games.  First up is a story from Wonder Woman #66, published in May 1954 and written by Robert Kanigher with art by H.G. Peter.

The Duke of Deception, ruler of Mars, wanted to convince all of the other planets to invade Earth.  He captured Wonder Woman to show that she couldn’t defend Earth anymore, but the other planetary representatives were concerned that Earth’s “champion athletes and fighters” could raise a troublesome opposition.  Luckily, the Duke had captured several of them as well, and arranged a series of games to show how weak and ineffectual they were.

The kicker was that the athletes were all drugged so they’d lose easily.  Recognizing this, Wonder Woman claimed the right to participate on their behalf, even though the penalty for losing was death.  The other planetary representatives agreed, and so Wonder Woman became a contestant in the first ever:

So ominous!!  In the first event, the group travelled to Jupiter where a kangaroo-like Jovian champion topped 100 feet in the pole vault.  With Jupiter’s increased gravity, Wonder Woman could barely jump at all, but she noticed that her pole was made from a Jovian rubber tree.  She squeezed the pole to get the sap from it and then:

The second event was on Mercury, where Wonder Woman had to face off against Mercury’s best swimmer.  However, Mercury is way hotter than Earth because it’s closer to the sun and their swimming events take place in molten lava.  The lava would kill Wonder Woman, but she’s a quick thinker.  Her bracelets were made of Amazonium, the hardest substance known to man, so she squeezed them until they became a liquid and coated herself with the metal so she could withstand the heat, and then:

The final event of the Olympics of Terror took place on Mars, where Wonder Woman faced off against the Duke of Deception himself in the discus throw.  After the Duke only tossed the discus a few feet, Wonder Woman was prepared to beat him with ease, but the discus kept coming back at her every time she threw it.  The dastardly Duke had replaced it with a boomerang discus!!  But Wonder Woman was oh so clever:

Thoroughly bested by Wonder Woman, the Duke of Deception’s plan failed and the rest of the planets decided not to invade Earth.

So there you have it, Wonder Woman’s first triumphant visit to an Olympic Games!!  The next time you’re out enjoying not being under the thumb of cruel, oppressive alien forces, remember that you’ve got Wonder Woman to thank.

NEXT TIME: Continuing our intergalactic them, we move on to a certain Venus and the current Olympiad!!

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